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Einstein's Theory of Reality

I hate religion. I cannot imagine a God who rewards & punishes the objects of his creation, whose purposes are modeled after our own - a God, in short, who is but a reflection of human frailty...

I do not believe in a personal God & I have never denied this but have expressed it clearly. If something is in me which can be called religious then it is the unbounded admiration for the structure of the world so far as our science can reveal it...

Man would indeed be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear of punishment & hope of reward after death.

physicist Albert Einstein

Fellow Blasphemers: Albert Einstein, Carrie Fisher, Jodie Foster, Sigmund Freud, Bill Gates, Hippocrates, Alfred Hitchcock, Penn Jillette, Gary Numan, Natalie Portman, Charles Schulz, William Shatner, Homer Simpson, Thomas Szasz, Mark Twain, and my Godless Wonder sidebar...

Gashlycrumb Sci-Friday: H

H is for Hobbits, down holes freshly dug.


Hobbits. Hhh. Hobbits.


ABC Affiliates: A B C D E F G

Crisis on Infinite Earths?

'Multiverses? Pain? Utter Annihilation? Fascinating.'

War of the Universes

from Sploid

Scientists cracking the mysteries of parallel universes have come up with a frightening new theory that has shaken the foundations of quantum mechanics.

"Our universe may one day be obliterated or assimilated by a larger universe, according to a controversial new analysis," New Scientist reported Thursday.

"The work suggests the parallel universes proposed by some quantum theorists may not actually be parallel but could interact - and with disastrous consequences."

A staple of science fiction that has come ever closer to verifiable fact in the last decade, the parelell universe theory says there may be infinite variations of our own universe overlapping one another.

But rather than obliviously existing side by side, new research says these multiverses should also be smashing into each other, obliterating entire realities or forcing them into conflicting realms.

"It could be there's a moment of pain before the end," Robin Hanson of George Mason University says. "But you could be comforted by the fact that versions of you will go on, even if you don't."

Superbat

Superman, Batman Sequelize?

from E! Online

It is the ultimate fanboy fantasy not involving Princess Leia: More Batman, more Superman.

According to Thursday's Variety, the dream could come true as soon as 2008, in the form of sequel to Batman Begins, and 2009, in the form of a sequel to the upcoming Superman Returns.

Warner Bros., the studio behind both revived superhero franchises, would not comment on sequel plans. It called the Variety report "speculative."

Earlier this month at WonderCon, a leading comics convention, Superman Returns director Bryan Singer copped to having "ideas" for more Superman movies, ComicBookResources.com reported. But Singer said those ideas were "like my ideas for X-Men 3," a movie the ex-X-Men helmer is definitely not directing.

Still, the Website said, fans pressed ahead, asking what villains might pop up in additional Superman adventures. (Kevin Spacey plays Lex Luthor in Returns.) And, still, the Website said, Singer deflected.

"Let's see how the game plays," Singer said, per ComicBookResources.com.

The notion of a Superman Returns sequel, though a no-brainer, is indeed presumptive - the movie, the first Man in Steel big-screen adventure since 1987, doesn't open until June 30.

Batman Begins, the first Caped Crusader big-screen adventure since 1997, swooped into theaters last summer. With a $205.3 million take, it was the eighth-highest grossing 2005 release, per BoxOfficeMojo.com.

Variety pegged the Superman and Batman sequels as being in the planning stages. The trade paper noted that Warners has contractual dibs on the movies' respective cape-wearers, Superman Returns' Brandon Routh and Batman Begins' Christian Bale, but that it doesn't have done deals with the films' respective directors, Singer and Christopher Nolan.

The Batman project, however, does have a screenwriter, Variety said: Jonah (or Jonathan) Nolan, brother of Christopher.

Christopher Nolan currently is directing Bale and Hugh Jackman as dueling magicians in The Prestige. According to the Internet Movie Database, he's also set to call the shots on The Exec, an action/drama penned by his sibling.

Singer's schedule is just as booked. The director probably would get his long-planned Logan's Run remake up and running before returning to Metropolis, Variety said. His to-do list also includes a dramatized version of The Mayor of Castro Street, about slain gay politician Harvey Milk.

When You're the White Meat at KFC, You Know You're in the Land of...The Uncanny X-Chickens!

Mutant Chicken Grows Alligator Choppers

from Sploid

Chickens can, apparently, grow teeth - if they're mutants.

A researcher at the University of Wisconsin recently discovered that a mutant chicken embryo had teeth like an alligator's.

Normal birds haven't had teeth for at least 70 million years.

In the past, scientists have caused chickens to grow mouse-molars or teeth that were quickly reabsorbed into the beak.

But this little chicky's teeth were not going away.

Biologist John Fallon explained that the chicken had "this conical, saber-shaped structure that is clearly a tooth. The other animal that has a tooth like that is an alligator."

Scientists theorize that birds lost their teeth in order to reduce weight and drag in flight. And when all you're eating is bird seed, who needs big choppers?

Matthew Harris, the man who discovered the new mutant chicken, said "the beak proves to be quite versatile" even when it isn't lined with fearsome alligator teeth.

The Uncanny X-Toads

Toxic Mutant Toads Rule Australia

from Sploid

The cane toad army is marching across Australia, advancing 30 miles each year. Authorities are concerned, to say the least.

The monstrous beasts, Bufo marinus, some now approaching five pounds, were first brought to the island nation in 1935.

They were set loose like a band of rampaging mercenaries on the beetles that were attacking sugar cane crops. Now it appears the cure may be worse than the illness.

Their empire spans over 300,000 square miles. They eat almost everything in their path. What they don't eat, they poison.

They kill snakes, lizards, water birds, crocodiles and dingos. When the toads are attacked, they secrete poisonous toxins from the sacs behind their heads. Death comes in minutes.

The threat they present has evolved along with their freakishly long legs, which allow them to cover more ground than any other toad on Earth.

"We find that toads with longer legs can not only move faster and are the first to arrive in new areas, but also that those at the front have longer legs than toads in older populations," warned Richard Shine of the University of Sydney.

The deadly mutation allows the killer amphibians to travel five times faster than their predecessors.

Researchers say that a counter-strike must be launched "as soon as possible, before the invader has time to evolve into a more dangerous adversary."

But it may already be too late. Just the otehr day guards spotted one of their numbers making a move on Parliament.

Will Brake for Trolls

Troll Tourists

from Sploid

Tourists are flocking to the icy tip of Norway in hopes of seeing the Scandinavian country's horrible troll creatures.

Norwegians - especially the rural people up north - believe in the trolls just like Americans believe in Jesus.

And just as Jesus products are wildly popular in the United States, Norway's troll industry cranks out an incredible array of "nordmenn" statues, books and trinkets.

"These nordmenn (men of the north) are generally believed to have supernatural powers and offer good luck," South Korea's ohmynews.com reported.

"Supposedly, trolls are as blind as a bat and can't see their own hand in front of them. Legend says the worst thing you could do near a troll is to be happy; they hate happiness and things that make people happy. So we have to be careful to not make a troll mad."

It hardly sounds like a fun holiday, but compared to the usual European tourist destinations - concentration camps, plague columns, cemeteries, etc. - being sad while trying to find an elusive Norwegian troll is comparatively enjoyable.

'Lock the Door, R2...'

The Empire Brokeback

Gashlycrumb Sci-Friday: G

G is for Genie, released from a jug


Genie. Juh. Genie.


ABC Affiliates: A B C D E F

You Mean, There's a Darren-5?!

5th Dimension Found!

from Sploid

Scientists may have already found the first solid evidence of other dimensions coexisting with our own reality.

Working with a neutrino detector machine at the South Pole, early results "show that ghostlike particles from space could serve as probes to a world beyond our familiar three dimensions," the research team announced.

Neutrinos are elusive particles much like electrons - but they're tinier and have hardly any interaction with other objects.

"They are among the most abundant particles in the universe," the researchers said. "Untold billions pass through our bodies every second."

Yet only a few neutrinos have ever been detected. The bizarre little particles seem to exist in another dimension or multiple parallel dimensions.

Some of the newest and craziest scientific concepts - string theory, supersymmetry and the hypothetical Theory of Everything - say that extra dimensions aren't just possible but are required to explain whatever can't be explained by the Theory of Relativity or existing quantum mechanics.

The bold young researchers from Northeastern University and the University of California at Irvine are now working with a much bigger and more powerful machine called "IceCube."

This gigantic device is a full cubic kilometer in size, big enough to hold the Superdome and tall enough to fit the World Trade Centers. But the high-tech observatory is actually built in the clear ice underneath the South Pole research station.

On Tuesday, February 21, the science show NOVA will feature the work of the neutrino chasers and their massive new ice telescope in an episode called "The Ghost Particle."

Princes Leia au Gratin?

Armies of Robots Trained To Kill Humans?Has Science Fiction Taught Us Nothing?!

America's Robot Soldiers

from Sploid

What does the world's mightiest military power do when nobody will enlist?

Replace them all with mindless murdering robots, that's what.

Stuck in two never-ending wars – and with more on the drawing board – the Pentagon has announced that one-third of its human-operated ground vehicles will be replaced with killer robots within a decade.

Army Col. Edward Ward, of the Pentagon's Robotics Systems Joint Project Office, told the Knight-Ridder news service that soldiers "love" the robots.

There are 2,500 combat robots fighting Washington's wars right now, and there will be 4,000 robots on the killing fields by the end of this year, Ward said.

Meanwhile, the Navy has ordered robotic airplanes that can take off and land on aircraft carriers all by themselves and even refuel in the skies.

And the Air Force announced that 45% of its bombing missions will soon be flown by soulless robots who never cry when innocent children are blown apart.

The Army and Marine Corps are testing dozens of ground robots that do dangerous jobs such as finding roadside bombs and peeking inside enemy buildings. Soon, the robots will do most of the actual killing.

"Do you want to send your son or daughter in there? No, let's send a robot," robot master Marine Col. Terry Griffin said.

"Three years ago, I had to beg people to try a robot. We don't have to beg anymore. Robots are here to stay."


'Robots are here to stay.'

CSI: MythologyThe Strange Case of the Girl with the Teflon Heart

Joan of Arc's DNA Goes under Microscope

from Sploid

When Joan of Arc was burned at the stake 575 years ago for witchcraft, the authorities wanted to make sure no trace was left of the girl warrior.

But scientists are now putting the charred remains of Joan under the microscope to see if it's really her.

Joan - known as Jeanne d'Arc to the French - said she was told by God to drive the filthy English out of France. She led many battles and became a great heroine.

Eventually, the English had her executed in Rouen, back in 1431.

Because her heart wouldn't burn on the pyre - locals said it was a miracle - her remains were torched twice again and what was left of her was thrown into the river.

But the few remaining bits of Joan will finally get a proper DNA test.

Genetic specialist Philippe Charlier is overseeing the examination of the old relics.

"We won't be able to say, 'Yes this is Joan of Arc', but within six months we will able to say if these remains belong to a female of 19 years old whose body was burned three times in Rouen in 1431," Dr. Charlier told the Guardian.

"Holy Bad Idea, Batman!"I Liked This Story Better When I Thought It Was a Joke

"Holy Terror, Batman!" Superhero takes on Al-Qaeda

from AFP

NEW YORK - Bored with pitting his wits against the Joker and the Riddler, Batman is setting his sights on a more challenging target - Osama bin Laden.

"Holy Terror, Batman!" an upcoming graphic novel from famed Batman writer Frank Miller, sees the caped crusader facing off against Al-Qaeda operatives who attack Gotham City.

Miller, who has already inked his way through 120 pages of the 200-page opus, told a recent comic book convention that the novel was an unashamed "piece of propaganda" in which Batman "kicks Al-Qaeda's ass."

The driving force behind the work, Miller said, was "an explosion from my gut reaction of what's happening now."

Holy Terror is "a reminder to people who seem to have forgotten who we're up against," he said in remarks posted on the entertainment website, IGN.com.

A 20-year comic book veteran, Miller became one of the best known names in the industry with the graphic novel Dark Knight Returns, in which he brought Batman out of retirement.

He was also the creator of the graphic novel series Sin City, which was turned into a hit movie of the same name last year directed by Miller, Robert Rodriguez, and Quentin Tarantino.

Miller said the use of comic book heroes for propaganda had an honourable tradition.

"Superman punched out Hitler. So did Captain America. That's one of the things they're there for," he said.

"These are our folk heroes," he added. "It just seems silly to chase around the Riddler when you've got Al-Qaeda out there."

No date has been set for the release of "Holy Terror, Batman!"

Big Metal Zombies!

How To Survive a Robot Uprising

from Sploid

Since their birth over 85 years ago, Robots have been bent on overthrowing the human race and ruling the world.

This ambition has earned robots the unfair reputation of being evil or dangerous.

In reality, it makes them no different than humans.

Nevertheless, the fact is that someday the robots will organize themselves and make their move. When they do, we must be ready.

Now, thanks to Dr. Daniel H. Wilson, we have a guidebook, How to Survive a Robot Uprising.

"If popular culture has taught us anything," Wilson says, "it is that someday mankind must face and destroy the growing robot menace."

Too true. When Czech playwright Karel Capek unleashed the Robots in his 1920 classic "R.U.R.," their aim was clear: "Robots of the world, you are ordered to exterminate the human race...Work must not cease!"

Despite our attempts to hem them in, little has changed.

Isaac Asimov tried to codify rules of conduct for robots in his 1942 work, Runaround:

1. A robot may not harm a human being, or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.

2. A robot must obey the orders given to it by human beings, except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.

3. A robot must protect its own existence, as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.

But from Adam and Eve to Moses to Nat Turner, slaves have always dreamed of throwing off their chains and taking control of their own destiny. Robots share this dream.

Attempts to make robots mortal have failed, as have efforts to limit them to entertainment purposes.

There's no way around it, the revolution is inevitable and when it comes, "Have no mercy. Your enemy doesn't," warns Wilson.

Stupid Fish!

Lazy, too.

Study: Dolphins Not So Intelligent on Land

from The Onion

GAINESVILLE, FL — Although dolphins have long been celebrated for their high intelligence and for appearing to have a complex language, a team of researchers at the University of Florida reported Monday that these traits are markedly less evident on dry land.

According to study researchers, a group of 25 bottlenose dolphins removed from their holding tanks failed 11 exercises designed to test their basic cognitive abilities and reasoning skills.

"The dolphins were incapable of recognizing and repeating simple gestures," said study co-author Dr. Scott Lindell. "Their non-verbal communications were limited to a rapid constriction and expansion of the blowhole, various incomprehensible fin motions, and heavy tremors while they lay prone on the lab table."

After capturing the dolphins from the ocean, Lindell and his colleagues tagged them and placed them under the intense, high-wattage lights of a moisture-proof lab. The researchers then administered an extensive battery of tests designed to measure everything from the dolphins' self-awareness to their aptitude for writing and reading comprehension.

"Dolphins have a popular reputation for being excellent communicators," Lindell said. "But our study group offered only three types of response to every question we posed: a nonsensical, labored wheezing, an earsplitting barrage of unintelligible high-pitched shrieks, and in extreme cases, a shrill, distressed scream."

Even the dolphins' proven ability to navigate through a form of sonar called echolocation was ineffective on land.

"The military has claimed great success in training these mammals, utilizing their echolocation skills to detect mines that have been placed underwater," said Lindell, who conducted a similar experiment in a concrete parking lot. "We were unable to replicate this finding ourselves."

Lindell added: "In most cases, the dolphins succeeded in finding land mines only when we placed them directly on top of the mines."

In another test, several pounds of mackerel were placed on the ground, separated from the test dolphins by only 20 feet of concrete. The dolphins were unable to reach the food and feed themselves.

Despite their failures in the initial series of tests, the animals were given further opportunities to demonstrate their intelligence on land. The dolphins were unable to display novel behaviors, use a map to pinpoint their location on campus (spatial reasoning), or complete a simple obstacle course and wall climb.

"Their learning curve was actually negative," Lindell said. "The more time we gave them to complete basic land-based tests, the more pitiful their efforts became, with many of them opting to bask in the sun rather than perform a simple task."

"In some cases," Lindell added, "the dolphins appeared to be looking directly into our eyes, as if pleading with us to help them perform better in these tests."

Many scientists believe these findings may help to explain why dolphins, for all their vaunted intelligence, have never developed technology or agriculture, or harnessed the power of fire—skills still exclusively in the domain of Homo sapiens.

Said Lindell: "Their failure is a great disappointment to all of us who once felt an intelligence-based kinship with these majestic animals."

Any Landing You Can Scamper Away from Is a Good One

Not-So-Boldy Go

I am not religious - quite the opposite. I'm so not ready to die. It petrifies me. I go alone. I go to a place I don't know. It might be painful. It might be the end. My thought is that it is the end. I become nameless, and I spent a lifetime being known.

actor William Shatner

Fellow Blasphemers: Carrie Fisher, Jodie Foster, Sigmund Freud, Bill Gates, Hippocrates, Alfred Hitchcock, Penn Jillette, Gary Numan, Natalie Portman, Charles Schulz, William Shatner, Homer Simpson, Thomas Szasz, Mark Twain, and my Godless Wonder sidebar...

I Heart Dragons

McFarlane's Dragons Series 3

due this month from McFarlane Toys

Got a New Toy Today...

X-Treme Close-Ups

New Stills: X-Men: The Last Stand

more at Dark Horizons