Thursday, September 22, 2005:
The Day the Earth Caught Fire!

I got home from work tonight, stepped out of my car, and saw something inexplicable in the night sky. I slowly walked out in the middle of the street, oblivious to any car that might strike me down. The further I walked, the more I saw, and the slower my pace became. And then I just stopped, awestruck. I heard my keys hit the ground, and something inside of me screamed run!

"What the fuck?"

The sky was on fire.

A spiraling ribbon of glowing mist blazed across the sky as a white fireball streaked away, leaving a great cone of dusty, astral light in its wake. People came out of their houses and pointed. Cars stopped, windows opened, and everything around me just sort of stopped. And we all stared at the mysterious, beautiful, and slightly troubling events above us.

It occured to me, as I fumbled for my camera, that this is the part of the movie where the aliens invade Earth or the nuclear bomb descends or the comet strikes and wipes out all life. This is the part where we all die. Camera pulls back to a residential street filled with clueless citizens just standing and staring stupidly at their pretty death, wondering what it is - right before the flesh is blasted off our bones. Cut to my smoldering skeleton still holding the camera, the viewscreen showing the last picture I took: The explosion that wiped out humanity.

What a cliche way to die!

Ends up it was just the military. No aliens. No robots bursting through the ground. No shrieking women running down the street on fire. Nothing cool at all.



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